solo people at nautilus teachings

 

we see them
every day,
people walking alone
dining alone
sitting in
their singular beach chair
nose in a book
asleep
or what about the
life of the party person
who appears unattached?

most people we see
by themselves
we never think twice about…
we just go about our
daily routine
completing our lists
of to do tasks
rushing here to there
picking up
dropping off
purchasing
just lost in our own
little lives…

do these people
feel ‘in’ while they are alone?
do they sing happy songs?
pause to help someone?
give to the homeless?
volunteer at church and school?
pay their bills on time?
do they ever worry,
feel sad
or hurt?

what does it take for
you
to feel ‘in’ while alone?
do you pick up someone
just because they smile at you
talk to you
buy you a drink
because you are so
lonely
you need to be loved
touched
held
maybe even listened to?

people gather at work parties
social gatherings
and sometimes
on their drive home
wander into a
local bar
to feel accepted
welcomed,
maybe even needed…

loneliness,
the sadness which envelops people
when they are alone,
without partner
no calling
or passion in life
can lead to a deep depression,
so it’s no wonder
some turn to
familiar vices
and addictions
to ease their pain,
lighten their mood
make them feel as if
for a small moment
they fit in…

how do we know
when someone feels this way
if they do not
text, message or call us?

honestly
we
don’t…
sure, we can make
an educated guess
but no-one i know
wants to accuse
or point a finger
let alone
self diagnose
someone they love…

it is so, so, so
important
we make time to listen
to the lost soul
sitting all alone
in any corner
at a party,
give a person
who sits solo
at church
a warm hug
reach out to our
elderly neighbors
letting each person know
we are glad they are here…

every holiday season
my mom baked
like a crazy woman
dozens of
coffee cakes
breads and cookies…
she would divide them amongst
many paper plates
toss a few candy canes on top
wrap them in saran wrap
stick a bow on top
and tape a
merry christmas
from the schultz’s tag
on each one…
then she would hand deliver
to each neighbor
her confections
taking time to sit
share a cup of coffee
and listen…

i raised my kids the same way
and up until the baby turned 18
this is what we did
every christmas
wearing our christmas hats
listening to holiday music
driving to all the doors
of people we knew
and loved…

my mother taught me
the importance of
giving freely
loving without question
and always
lending an ear
to any one person
who needed it,
so needless to say
our table was never
vacant
people were always
coffee clutching
smoking cigarettes
eating her baked goodies
and laughing…

she dedicated her life
to healing
giving
volunteering
teaching
faith
and family…
i never felt poor
never cared if
i wore my cousins
hand me downs
ate day old break
or walked
everywhere…

she taught me to
sing with the crickets
wish on the stars
talk to God
run barefoot
through the park
lay on hot sidewalks
after running through
cold sprinklers
in the summer
build snowmen
live in the light of candles
make believe
create something
out of everything
in nature
love animals
and most important
she
taught
me
love…

during this holiday season
you will attend many
social functions
and you will see
people
all
alone…
are they lonely?
i don’t know
but what i do know
is how wonderful
they feel
when someone
walks away from
the ‘in’ crowd
they are laughing with
and
takes just a moment
or maybe even longer
to acknowledge them
and let them know
just like the old song says,

“You’ve got a friend in me
You’ve got a friend in me
When the road looks rough ahead
And you’re miles and miles from your nice warm bed
You just remember what your old pal said
Boy, you’ve got a friend in me
Yeah, you’ve got a friend in me

You’ve got a friend in me
You’ve got a friend in me
If you got troubles
I got them too
There isn’t anything
I wouldn’t do for you
We stick together, we can see it through
Cause you’ve got a friend in me
Yeah, you’ve got a friend in me

Some other folks might be a little bit smarter than I am
Bigger and stronger too
Maybe
But none of them
Will ever love you
The way I do
It’s me and you, boy

And as the years go by,
Our friendship will never die
You’re gonna see it’s our destiny
You’ve got a friend in me
You’ve got a friend in me
Yea You’ve got a friend in me”

reach out to someone today
tomorrow,
any day
just because
it’s good
to be a
kind
human…