catty women vs. kindness at nautilus teachings

“why are women so catty?”
was a question asked of me
by a young woman
i met recently…
before i could answer
she continued with,
“it seems like they are
always trying to one up me
whether it is in
what clothes they wear
how much they work out
how little they eat
how much sex they get…
i just don’t care…”
i smile
nod my head
pausing to see if
she has anything else to add
before i even begin…
“just yesterday
i was at work
minding my own business
doing exactly what i
was supposed to be doing
when out of the blue
i get an almost hate email
from a co-worker saying…
“you were supposed to……”
well i knew it was not on my to do list
but then when all her friends
banded together
in support of her
all of a sudden
i was the bad girl…
that really hurt
“so i talked to my boss
and even she took their side…
i just don’t get it.
i know i am new here
and they are all drinking buddies
but gosh
why pick on the new girl?”
by now my heart was breaking for her.
she was young
fresh from college
and hurting.
i took another breath
and waited
it appeared she was done
when she cried,
“i’m not complaining
i just don’t play their games
and i never ever lie…”
streamed down her cheek.
i wrapped her in a motherly hug
as she began to sob…
“why are women so mean?”

after a few moment she
composed herself and we
sat on a nearby bench.
it was my turn.
i began.
i am very much like you
in the fact
i don’t cheat, lie or steal
i never gossip
or am mean.
i too learned when i was your age
women can and will hurt you.
they will try to steal
your husband
your glory
even your strength.
you cannot let them get to you.
you have got to develop
self confidence
if you have faith,
and walk in the knowing
you are not wrong.
Let that hate feeling go …not good!
Try another approach –
feel bad for people that make themselves miserable.
Chalk it up to over worked & stressed women
that are obviously not having good sex !!!”
i notice her lips
curve up
into a huge smile
and she begins to belly laugh
soon we are both
we sit side by side
for a few more minutes
then she hugs me
thanks me
and waves
as she walks back to her desk.
we really are
each others keepers
we have such healing power
when we take the time
to really listen
to process everything said
and then offer
words of encouragement.
i could have taken the typical
catty side and said,
“well, those bitches…”
and then proceeded to help
her come up with a
‘get-even’ plan,
but that is not
who sheri is.
what would you do?
in this world
of people trying
to always one up one another
i say
choose the middle
for that is where true
buoyancy exists.
find your yoga breath-
breathe in and out
slowly through your nose
3-5 times
close your eyes
or find a focal point
be in everything that is happening
at a calmer level
this stuff is not about you
it never is…
we have no idea why
women behave in this manner
it is also the reason why
so many women
only have one bestie…
we cannot
put our happiness
in the hands of people.
i ran into her again
a few days later
she was smiling
“hey!” she said
“hey, yourself…how goes it?”
“i took your advice
i went to the shooting range
last night
and got all my anger out.
then i got on my knees
and prayed
for the longest time.
i started crying
when all of a sudden
i felt lighter
like all my burdens were just gone…
i let that shit go!”
she giggles
throws her head back
then says,
“you reminded me who i was
and who i never wanted to be.
thank you for taking time
to listen to me…”
we hug one more time
and part ways…
all it takes is a few moments
of your time
to stop
and be in the moment
for someone.
is free
so, please
share it
with someone today!