sheri’s house at nautilus teachings

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nearly
10 years ago
d and i married…
at this time his walls
and ceilings were all
painted a shade
of leaf green-
like the painter
bought a 5 gallon bucket
and kept adding white to it
with each room he painted!
the master bedroom
was burnt red
counter tops
were peach
tile flooring was
peach, purple, tannish mix…
please, stop me now,
or i may have to scream
out loud,
‘WHAT WAS HE THINKING?’
instead i will giggle.
he was a man
on a budget
redoing
his home after divorce
and bought
everything on clearance…
then i appeared
we fell in love
got married
and
the
RENOVATIONS
began.
the first to go was his
‘trophy wall’
a 8’ tall x 20’ long
green mush of
what photos she left him
and some were duplicates
all framed
and hanging
floor to ceiling…
at the end of the wall
was a tiny three foot
wicker shelving unit
which held every trophy
he had acquired since the divorce…
are you giggling?
because i am.
every friend he had, whispered,
“you took the wall down…thank you”
then they smiled.

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over the course of the next year
i completely made over
the entire house, pool and added
a front porch
which houses my
beloved teak furniture
that was stolen
and i fought to get back,
successfully…
i have put mosaic on walls,
floors
showers
breakfast bars
sidewalks
and stem walls.
i replaced every
piece of his furniture
with new stuff
thinking
i am making this our home…
granite counter tops
new bathrooms
appliances
and i even
emptied
and threw away
the remnants in drawers of
his ex marykay girl friend
and her smart mouthed daughter
not to mention some
tiny notebook that said
‘i kissed……today…i wonder
if she’s the one…’
MEN!
the list goes on and on…

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the good news is
his office got a makeover!
we replaced all his old furniture
and paintings
with everything from the house!
so technically,
he still has his stuff!
but the funny thing that
came from all of this was
our dear friend h…
h lovingly named our home
‘sheri’s house…’
whenever we have a bash
or invite them over
he smiles
and says,
‘oh, you mean Sheri’s house…’
this brings a chuckle from
all who are listening.
we all have past yuk!
but it is the
woman’s job
to make sure
she does not forget
to clean the attic
(of which we found
mini wine bottle remnants galore
from his ex-wife, after renovations)
the guest closets
and dressers
every nook and cranny,
baby…
get in there
and make it
YOURS…
now for those of you
who have never
been divorced
God bless you…
but for the majority
of women i know,
i say
focus
take control
if he loves you
that shit goes…
give him one
Tupperware bin
to store his
‘memories’ in,
that’s it,
then cram it way back
in the attic
or bury it in the yard…
one by one
replace every bit
of his clothes
shoes
underwear
from the moment
you said
‘i do’
your lives were joined
you accept his past
as he does yours
your both accept the baggage
but
goshdarnit
you do not have to
sleep in her bed
sit on her furniture
look at the paintings
they picked out together
on vacation or at a show
or accept any piece
of hers as yours…
even towels!
let it all go
pack up garbage bags
call your favorite
donation affiliation
and give it away…
then roll up your sleeves
put on your favorite music
and get to work
on making it
your own love shack,
as i fondly refer to ours…
yes,
in the eyes of our friend, h
it will always be
‘sheri’s house’
and we will always joke
about it
between you and me
i love that the boys
have named
it
‘sheri’s house…’
because this chick
is going no where
until God calls me home…

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