surprises at nautilus teachings

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how are you
with surprises?
i can only remember
one time
i was thrown a
surprise party-
yes
they got me,
but being put
on stage
for an introvert
is mind numbing
thank goodness
it was back in the day
when i still did
jello shots!
i have struggled my
whole life with this
because i am
happiest
when i am alone
painting and writing,
hence
do you think i plan
surprises, ever?!
that would be a
resounding and very loud NO!
so for me to even
consider doing this
thing i am doing
as a surprise
for the man i love-
who,
he himself
hates surprises,
compliments
and ego stroking,
is a challenge…
but i want to do this
for him
and i don’t want to tell him
so i am
willingly
trying to keep a huge secret
and i am about to burst
at the seams
because i want to share this
with him so, so, so much…

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but here’s the thing
i have been able to be silent
about it because
A.) although his first reaction will be
“why did you do this…”
B.) after 5 minutes of lecturing me
about spending hard earned money
he will without a doubt
be so filled with gratitude
that i may just get that vacation
for our 10th anniversary
this fall i am so hoping for…
that’s not why i am doing this
at all, but it sure sounds fabulous!!!
i cannot keep a straight face
if i even attempt to lie…
sleeping is difficult right now,
my mind won’t shut off…
Thursday night i have a class
and by then it will all be ready
and delivered but i’m not
unveiling it until Friday
but i worry he will find it
because it cannot be hidden…
ah, Friday…
after he has worked a very long
12 hours a day week
gone in for his physical
so he can have his dreaded foot surgery
he will come home
to this…
and if he even begins to
give me lip
i will just put on that pretty little smile
i carry around
hike up my boobies
wrap him up in a big ole bear hug
and then
whisper in his ear,
“let’s enjoy your gift
you can yell at me later
if you still wish too….”
surprises are not easy
to carry off
and most people do not like them
but for once
this ole midwestern girl
is going to try and pull one over
on her much deserving and Einstein husband-
wish me luck!

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